Will my formula predict for BYU to go undefeated, and what does my dog think?

LEEEEEEEEETS GOOOOOOOOO COUUUUUUUUUUUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!

What a game last Saturday! Wow! Think about all those false narratives that have been proven wrong:

"BYU's overrated. They can't compete with the nation's best." Wrong! BYU didn't just compete with Notre Dame. They outplayed them.

"BYU's not going to be able to run the ball on Notre Dame without LJ Martin." Wrong! Preston Rex had 10 carries for 66 yards, which was 6.6 yards per carry.

"It's really just the Power 2 plus Notre Dame. The Big 12 is just a glorified G6 conference." Wrong! The Big 12 now has three teams ranked in the top 10, which matches the Big 10's three and exceeds the SEC's two. This after they had zero top ten teams in the preseason.

"The only way BYU wins is if they win the turnover margin." Wrong! BYU had two turnovers to Notre Dame's one, and they won anyway.

"Notre Dame was so much better than BYU last year that they were more deserving of a spot in the college football playoff than BYU despite having a worse record against a weaker schedule." Wrong! Notre Dame has one of the highest returning production rankings in the country, so the team BYU just beat was very similar to last year's team.

"There's no way Bear's going to be the first BYU player since Steve Young to get a passing touchdown, a rushing touchdown, and a receiving touchdown all in one game on the day Steve Young was the guest picker for ESPN College Gameday." Wrong! "CJ Carr knows how to spike the football without fumbling it." Wrong! "Dick Harmon, Spencer Higinbotham, and Spencer's dog are all nuts for saying that BYU is going to win." Wrong!

OK, I don't think I ever heard anyone say any of those last three, but they were all wrong. Also, my dog's nuts for other reasons. More on that later.

In case there are any of you who are still questioning whether or not BYU's win was legitimate because of what happened on the final play, let me put that to rest. I've looked at that last play several times. BYU's Evan Johnson did not interfere with Notre Dame's Jaden Greathouse. In fact, Greathouse grabbed Johnson's shoulder pad with one hand and his arm with his other hand. It basically looked like an EFY slow dance, except Schmev wasn't into it. So if anything, it should've been offensive pass interference.

What I want someone to do is take a video of that last play and photoshop it so Greathouse and Johnson switch jerseys and then show it to a bunch of Notre Dame fans. I 1000% guarantee that at least 90% of them will say, "Yep, that should've been pass interference against BYU."

Yes, there should've been 1 second left on the clock, but that just would've given Notre Dame the ball at either the 9 or the 19, and either way, the odds would've been in BYU's favor. So now, you can celebrate this win with no reservations. You're welcome.

The only real contraversy this week is why BYU's not number 1. Miami's best win is against a bunch of evil twelve-year-olds. (Take a moment to see if you can figure out the joke I just made.)

Alright. Moment of truth. Does my formula say that BYU is going to go undefeated? Last week, it had BYU losing to Utah and Kansas each by one, but BYU had a much better week than both of those teams, so you would expect my formula to flip both games in BYU's favor. But my formula has done some pretty unpredictable things, so let's see. (By the way, I've decided to start putting the away team first and the home team second so you can see who has home field advantage. Also, it will make things easier for me when comparing predictions.)

BYU football's remaining schedule formula predictions

BYU 26 UCF 20

Arizona St 16 BYU 37

BYU 28 Utah 23 (LETS GOOOOO!!!!)

Baylor 16 BYU 30

BYU 31 Kansas 24 (That's better.)

Cincinnati 20 BYU 39

So yes, for the first time this season, my formula says BYU's going undefeated. Now, does it say we will win the Big 12 championship? Previously, I've been determining BYU's Big 12 title opponent by looking at who is ranked the highest according to my formula, but this time, I did a prediction for all of the relevant games and determined who would be at the top of the standings. Surprisingly, my formula says Utah and Texas Tech are both going to lose multiple games and that BYU's opponent will be Oklahoma St. It says BYU will win 33-25. If my formula is correct, BYU just may be the number 1 seed in the college football playoff.

But now for an even more important question: What does my dog think? I'm now introducing a new segment to these articles featuring my absolutely adorable dog. His name is Wooford Woodwoof, and we call him Woofie for short. He's a Yorkie, and he likes licking my hands. Before the Notre Dame game, I told him to lick my left hand if he thought Notre Dame would win or lick my right hand if he thought BYU would win, and I told him to lick once for each point they would win by. He licked my right hand 7 times. He was only off by 3. His prediction was closer than that of most experts.

So from now on, every week, I'm going to ask him to make predictions in the same way. We've done this a few times with mixed results. With the 2024 Holy War, he said BYU would win by 1, and he was spot on. However, in 2023, I had him do it for the Iowa St game, and he said BYU would win by over 100 points. BYU lost by 32, so he was juuust a bit off. My hand must have tasted especially good that day. I have figured out he likes my right hand more than my left, so I think I'm always going to have the right hand be for BYU and have the left hand be for their opponent.

So what was his prediction for this week's game against UCF? Well, he hesitated for quite a while, and then he licked my left hand once, which means he thinks UCF will win by 1. I think the reason he hesitated was because he didn't want to upset me. He does have a point, though. This game checks all the boxes of a trap game: a road game in an unfamiliar climate against a team that's statistically better than their record shows the week after an emotional win in a huge game. Still, I hope Woofie's as wrong as he was about the Iowa St game.

(Also, if you didn't get the joke earlier, I was referring to the Wake Forest Demon Deacons. In The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, young men become deacons at the age of 12, so a demon deacon is an evil 12-year-old. I waited till now to explain it so you would have time to figure it out.)

Alright. Time for my weekly competition with Dick Harmon. Here are my predictions from last week, and here are his. For each game where we both made a prediction, whoever got the closest point spread (or whoever picked the correct team if we picked different teams) will get 2 points with the following potential bonuses: +4 for the BYU game, +2 for the Utah game, +2 for ranked vs ranked games, +2 for nonconference Big 12 vs P4 games (I clarified last week that BYU-Notre Dame counted for this), x2 if we disagreed on the winner, and x2 if we got it exactly right.

Also, whoever gets the closest on the point total gets 1 point with the following bonuses: +2 for the BYU game, +1 for the Utah game, +1 for ranked vs ranked games, +1 for nonconference Big 12 vs P4 games, x2 if our predicted point spreads were at least 15 points apart, and x2 if we got it exactly right. The season series is currently tied 3-3. This last week was the first week with the new changes to my formula that make it so all that matters is what has happened on the field this season. Let's see whether or not these changes were a good thing:

And the final score is... Harmon 35 Higinbotham 40. (I said I'd start putting the away team first and the home team second. This is my article, so I'm the home team.) The first week with the adjustments to my formula was a successful one. It all came down to the Utah game. I either needed to get both the spread and the total or get the spread exactly right. Both of those things happened, but if either team had scored one more point, neither would've happened, and Harmon would've won. I now lead the season series 4-3.

Here are my formula's predictions for this week:

Indiana 24 Michigan 19

LSU 25 Auburn 21

Pittsburgh 21 Miami 35

Texas Tech 33 Cincinnati 32

West Virginia 21 TCU 36

Baylor 26 Kansas 30

BYU 26 UCF 20

Oklahoma 20 Mississippi St 24

Tennessee 24 South Carolina 25

Texas A&M 17 Alabama 30

Kansas St 32 Arizona St 30

San Diego St 30 Colorado St 35

Colorado 26 Oklahoma St 32

Iowa St 26 Arizona 34

Ole Miss 18 Texas 28

USC 19 Wisconsin 29

Utah St 24 Texas St 39

North Dakota St 21 New Mexico 20

Houston 30 Utah 32

As I always say at the end of every article, remember to be kind to the officials. Oh yeah, and Woofie wants me to add this: remember to be kind to your dog. (Even when they make a prediction you don't like.)

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