Welcome to Memoirs from the Mount, a column that explores the twisting catacombs of my consciousness. From the solitary peak of Mount Fuji to the cascading slopes of Mount Timpanogos, I'm sending a telegram of my perspective on current events surrounding BYU athletics.
Previous edition of Memoirs: BYU's rivals only point to money because the alternative is too frightening
BYU football is on the national radar, and it's ruining my life.
For years, I thought this was all I'd ever wanted. A chance to watch my favorite football program contending with the very best programs from sea to shining sea. I hollered when BYU shed the cinder blocks of independence to join the Big 12 Conference. I squealed with glee when Sitake's program erased the pain of a losing record with a blowout win against a ranked Kansas State team. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the Cougars breach the top 10 of the Week 3 AP Top 25.
And through three games, I've been impressed by the 2026 Cougars. LJ Martin is as powerful as ever, shifting the geography of the field with every booming step. Bear Bachmeier has refined his game and his body over the offseason, and appears poised and confident in the pocket of his All-American O-line. Even without Jay Hill, the Cougars' defense is stout and stonewalled the team's first Big 12 opponent, Arizona, for an entire half of football.
But three games in, and the easy part is behind the undefeated Cougars, and with each additional victory tossed onto the heap, the anxiety of a collapse becomes too potent to ignore.
I've been a fan of BYU football since the day I was born, and year by year, I've always been disappointed by this team. But the concept of a team that is experienced, talented, and boasts some of the strongest continuity of any program in the nation is one that I am not familiar with.
Still, I can't help but feel like we're inching closer to anguish with every week.
I'm reminded of a childhood trip to the reservoir in Springville, Utah. The sun was shining, the beach was swimming with more people than the water, and we were gradually descending step-by-step into the bafflingly frigid pond. First our ankles, then to our knees. Inch by inch we endured the frosty shock, with each step delivering a new layer of suffering previously unthinkable. By the time the diabolical water met us mid-thigh, someone said something that chilled me to my very core: "I'm about to reach the point of no return."
At that point, there was no reason to keep any part of ourselves above the water's surface -- it was about to be all or nothing.
I get that same horrible feeling with BYU football this season.
The Cougars' path to a national championship is clear: win the Big 12 Conference Championship and compete in the College Football Playoff. With an experienced team -- most of which appeared in the Big 12 title game a year ago -- and a favorable schedule, this objective has never been more possible.
But that was also true of last season, when the team reached the title bout with Texas Tech with an 11-1 record and just one loss to that exact Red Raiders team.
It was also true of the previous team, which was ranked 6th overall, according to the College Football Playoff selection committee, before imploding against a sub-.500 Kansas team in Provo.
This year, the Cougars have a chance to claim the league's automatic CFP bid that has eluded them in the two previous seasons, with the only clear regular-season threat standing in the way being the Utah Utes, who have looked very impressive through four games and will host BYU in November.
But the allure of securing an at-large consideration is where my deepest concern lies, and that $20 bill on a fishing hook dangles directly above a home game against the top-10 Notre Dame Fighting Irish, a team virtually guaranteed a spot in the 12-team CFP bracket so long as they don't fall apart against their ravenous slate of opposition like Stanford, Navy, and Boston College.
In all seriousness, the Irish could get tripped up by the likes of Miami, a current top-5 foe, and SMU. If Notre Dame doesn't win in Provo, however, their outlook becomes a little less certain.
Both sides know what's at stake in what should be one of the most highly-anticipated games on the college football calendar.
But none of that means a thing if the Cougars can't reach that fateful October 17 showdown with an unblemished resume of their own. And when Colorado State's third-string quarterback can comfortably hang 16 points on your reserves, it's frightening to consider what may happen if Kelly Poppinga is forced to scan the sideline against Notre Dame, Utah, or another heavy-hitting foe.
Now BYU football stares down the real beginning of their 2026 season. 3-0 is a great start for a team that faced a hungry Arizona squad in Week 2, but a road trip to TCU followed by a matchup with an Iowa State team already punching above their weight stand in the way of potential immortality.
Part of me wishes BYU would just lose against TCU this weekend and take me out of my misery. If Notre Dame marches around LaVell Edwards Stadium and flattens it like Jericho, maybe I can just enjoy football again. With expectations greater than ever before, BYU is no longer a CFP hopeful -- they have a seat at the table if they perform as expected. An honest-to-goodness swing at the national championship is within reach for this team, and it's Playoff or bust for Kalani Sitake's program in 2026.
I've been hurt too many times to expect it, myself. Prove me wrong Cougars, and please do it quickly.
Calvin Barrett is the Associate Editor for SLC Dunk. Originally from Springville, Utah, he currently lives in Japan and has covered the NBA and college athletics since 2024.
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